We close the divide because we know to put our future first, We must first put our differences aside. We lay down our arms so we can reach out our arms to one another. We seek harm to none and harmony for all. Amanda Gorman
Nothing resonated with me more during the Biden/Harris inauguration than the words of a “skinny Black girl” from my hometown. With her red tiara bedecking regal hair, this QUEEN moved her rhythmic hands and let her lyrics sing. Wisdom from an old soul with a fresh face. On the outside, we share little in common, yet I found my truth coming out of her mouth. It was spellbinding.
In the world of “identities”, Amanda Gorman and I share little on the outside – race, age, body-type – but perhaps more on the inside – feminism, Angeleno, single parent homes. As a culture, we focus so much on identities, but the call for unity makes us question if we should be defined by them … or let them define others for us.
In 1990, two brilliant women wrote “Workforce America”, the first book for business about diversity and inclusion. Key to the training was the diversity wheel, which offers a structure to understand diversity. At the center of the wheel is personality, which is truly unique to each of us as individuals. The next circle are the “visible” elements of diversity, the ones mostly protected by Civil Rights laws: race, age, sexual orientation, gender identity, physical/mental ability, ethnicity, and national origin. The third ring are attributes that get less attention and are less immediately seen: education level, socioeconomic status, religion, family/relationship status, citizenship, experiences. And I suppose now, if we are to be honest, we have to include political leaning in the diversity wheel, for we’ve become a world that divides people – cancels people – based on their political persuasion.
If I look to the diversity wheel, I have many identities: white, college graduate, agnostic, single parent, cisgender female, left-winger, left-coaster, and left-hander. Our new President, Joe Biden has issued the call for decency, dignity, and unity. My charge, therefore, is to act decently, offer dignity, and work for unity with those who have different identities. Here are seven actions I want to take to expand my world:
Read books written by those who have a different lived experience.
Ninety-five percent of all New York Times best-sellers are written by white people. I want to amplify other voices, so am committed to reading more works by nonwhite people this year. I’m starting with Girl Woman Other, by Nigerian/British writer Bernardine Evaristo, followed by Your House Will Pay by Steph Cha, a Korean-American millennial.
Listen to music from other countries or in other languages.
I’ve added Kitaro, Fela Kuti, and Selena to my Spotify library and am looking for more (please send suggestions!)
Seek out stories about people who are different than me.
The pandemic has us all watching more television. I’m turning off cable news, which I believe truly exists to divide us, and instead looking for rich content from foreign lands or featuring “othered” characters: Chewing Gum, Money Heist, and Ali Wong’s “Baby Cobra” are on my list.
Take social media off my phone!
I have removed the Facebook app already and now need to delete Twitter. These spaces act as echo chambers where all I see is content that furthers my own opinions, demonizes those who disagree with me, and often write off people for one frailty or infraction. I’m determined to save myself from this world of meanness and exclusion!
Commit to trying different foods.
No matter where you live, I guarantee you there is a restaurant doing take out that has foods you’ve never eaten before. I know I live in a particularly diverse part of the world; 60% of Angelenos have a native tongue that isn’t English, but immigrant communities are everywhere, thankfully. I’m looking forward to tasting deliciousness from the Uyghur region of China (Dolan’s in Alhambra), Poland (Polka in Glendale) and Mariscos Jalisco in Boyle Heights.
Make the “Sunday Drive” a habit.
Aside from being one of the few things we can safely do, I find a day’s drive is a great chance to explore new neighborhoods and communities. First up on my list: The Watts Towers, Historic Filipinotown and the Manzanar National Historic Site.
Plan a post-covid trip to somewhere new.
Maybe my first post-pandemic trip will be to a national or state park, a neighboring state, or a foreign country, but wherever it is, the people there will do something differently than I do. I used to laugh when I lived in the UK and visiting Americans would complain about the water pressure in showers. The British BATHE. They have gloriously deep tubs that fill to the brim. Two ways of getting clean. Do we really need/want everyone to be just like us? And if you think this is unaffordable, I promise you, no matter your budget, it would be my pleasure to help you plan a trip somewhere new. Once we open up again, I’m hoping to visit Uzbekistan, Botswana, and the Galapagos.
I will always assert that travel is the BEST way to become more tolerant of others. When I visited Arkansas in 2018, it felt more “foreign” than most of Europe to this California girl, but I also learned that we have far more in common than we think, or than might appear on the surface. Marion, who worked the front desk at the very modest “hotel” in Jackson, certainly wasn’t interested in me when I checked, as she watched FoxNews and let me know there was a gun in her desk drawer. I could have written her off, but instead found, through the magic of conversation, that we shared a love of Mexican food, hiking, and dogs, as well as issues over body-image. I’m determined to push myself to keep looking for our common ground, to see the light in one another, to strive for tolerance, and remember that hatred is always grounded in fear. I hope you will join me in stepping into Biden’s “America United” challenge. Amanda Gorman – on one level, nothing like me – somehow spoke my truth. This is our shared humanity.
We will rebuild, reconcile, and recover. And every known nook of our nation and every corner called our country, Our people diverse and beautiful, will emerge battered and beautiful. When day comes, we step out of the shade of flame and unafraid. The new dawn balloons as we free it. For there is always light, if only we’re brave enough to see it. If only we’re brave enough to be it. Amanda Gorman
Well written, Milinda! It’s thoughtful and inspiring!